“Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person you become.” – Jim Rohn
“My sense of self and my mental health is much more powerful than any hint of wealth.” – Guru, rapper
“Why do you think you keep dating these psychotic women?”
I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and tried sincerely to come up with a believable answer. Anything besides the truth would suffice.
I’d been lying on my therapist’s couch for 45 minutes describing cycles of dysfunctional relationship after dysfunctional relationship after dysfunctional relationship. This last one had ended in tears and restraining orders.
Patterns were beginning to emerge.
I sat up, looked him square in the eyes, and told him the God’s dishonest truth:
“Because I have a fetish for women in straight jackets. It’s something about the tight fit and the inherent limitations on them being able to strike me. Help me doc.”
As usual, he said nothing. He just nodded slowly and looked at me with an overly understanding expression as if he could see straight through me, the wall behind me, and directly into the mind of God.
“Ok fine. It’s because I’m psychotic too – you win. Happy? I can’t believe I pay you for this torture.”
Prior to coming to this understanding, I had thought all women were crazy. Little did I know I was foolishly projecting my neuroses and past experiences on to the entire female gender group.
Not surprisingly, I kept attracting women who were something like a cross between Courtney Love and Lindsey Lohan (on their bad days).
Even if a woman I dated wasn’t crazy I’d make her crazy via my masterful skills of Freudian projection. Then I would promptly send her to my therapist for him to fix her for me.
I wish I were kidding. This went on for over a decade.
I love cycles, don’t get me wrong. I had a tricycle when I was a kid that was pretty hot. Menstrual cycles are cool because it’s the one time a month a woman acts a little crazy and I can know for sure I’m not projecting anything.
It’s when cycles turn vicious … vicious cycles are no fun.
So I decided I’d had enough. I was attracting mentally unstable women because I was mentally unstable. Fine. I made up my mind to stabilize and end the madness.
Within 12 months I met my wife – the epitome of sanity and self-restraint. Her nickname is Mother Teresa. We’re currently busy doing good deeds together and living happily ever after.
Why Am I Telling You This On A Blog About Wealth?
Because I think it would be helpful for you to picture wealth as a person.
Picture the characteristics of the type of human that other humans are naturally attracted to …
|✓ Self-Sufficient||✓ Non-Needy|
|✓ POWERFUL||✓ Confident|
|✓ Persuasive||✓ Trustworthy|
|✓ Responsible||✓ Respectful|
|✓ Present/Conscious||✓ Dependable|
|✓ Loving||✓ Free Spirited|
|✓ Creative||✓ Talented|
|✓ Resourceful||✓ Charitable|
|✓ Generous||✓ Fun|
|✓ COOL||✓ Emotionally Intelligent|
|✓ Socially Intelligent||✓ Intellectually Intelligent|
|✓ Wise||✓ Well Spoken|
|✓ Educated||✓ Socially Connected|
|✓ Physically Fit||✓ Mentally Stable|
A person like that doesn’t have to chase the opposite sex. They just have to walk in the room. The opposite sex comes to them.
Now understand that wealth is attracted to people with these same characteristics.
It’s worth noting that I was actively pursuing all those “crazy” women. They didn’t just pop out of nowhere. I went looking for them.
Once I stopped the chase and started focusing on self-development, my wife simply appeared. I didn’t even have to do anything. I was at a concert ordering a Grape Vodka & Red Bull at the concession stand, and she leaned over my shoulder and paid my bill for me. We got married 30 days later.
That’s how wealth works.
And don’t judge my drink either. It’s freaking delicious. And energizing. After extensive testing though, technical difficulties do start to emerge after the 6th one. Just a word of caution.
My point is … focus on wealth? You’ll get Courtney Love-style financial chaos.
Focus on developing that long list of characteristics above? Mother Teresa’s granddaughter will come knocking on your door dressed in lingerie with a briefcase full of hundos.
So what steps can you take right now? How do you grow?
“I want to grow. I want to be better. You Grow. We all grow. We’re made to grow. You either evolve or you disappear.” – Tupac Shakur
First you need to value personal growth at a deep fundamental level. Understand that everything you’re wanting in life comes naturally as a result of personal growth.
Second you need to come to grips with the following equation:
growth = pain
Hence the term “growing pains.”
So don’t be surprised when you feel the pain. Push through it, and you will be glad you did.
Then you need to start exercising your mind, body, and spirit like your life depends on it.
Indeed it does.
We have touched the mere tip of the iceberg. But you know what they say – “just the tip” is better than nothing at all. : )
Leave a comment below, say “I value growth!” and get to work!
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Recommended Reading: All the books I mentioned above.
Ancient Wisdom To Memorize: The generation of the upright will be blessed. Wealth and riches are in his house.
Affirmation For The Week: I value growth